Crisp: Woah…what is it?
Narr: The three members of the Flashpack climbed
from their small land transport and approached the mist. Taking his cue
from the others, Crisp walked on forwards
until Molly had to grab his arm to prevent him from causing possibly
irreparable damage to his person. They stood at the edge and watched the cloud
possibly hundreds of feet into the air and all along the ground for as
far as they
could see in both directions.
Keane: It’s some sort of thick…pinky…cloud….or something…
Narr: Molly picked up a nearby pebble and threw it into the cloud. It barely
disappeared before it came hurtling back at the Flashpack.
Molly: Mauve, Keane. Definitely an impenetrable Mauve cloud…
Slotter: Are you sure it’s mauve? I was thinking more of a lavender…
Crisp: Or even a light magenta.
Keane: Hi! Back to the part where it doesn’t matter what color it is?
The point is…are you sure it’s impenetrable?
Molly: Oh definitely. Julie and I, we…(quieter) we came across the
directions for assembling them one time…
Slotter: Well, if you know how to put one together, you must know how to
take it apart, right?
Molly: That’s the thing…we never built it. Granted it was simple
enough…I’m sure even Max could even do it, given thorough enough
directions (laughs). Some of the stuff you need to work it…man, only
the Truly Insane have access to those kinds of materials.
Narr: Right on cue, the maniacal laughter began, echoing dangerously through
Von Wicked: (laugh evily)
Keane: Um. That was creepy.
Slotter: It came from inside the cloud! Wait! Molly, weren’t you telling
me about these things a few months ago? Wasn’t the only person able
to construct one in the past ten years-
Von Wicked: That’s right, my dear girl! Von Wicked! (laughs)
Narr: The menacing figure…ok, so it wasn’t quite menacing…The
figure of…ok, fine, some kid in an oversized tux and a fake mustache
suddenly appeared in the cloud, floating some ten feet above the Flashpack.
Molly: No! You can’t be! We killed you! And why are you wearing that
silly fake mustache?
Von Wicked: (stops laughing) Actually, it’s Junior. But I figure since
Dad isn’t around anymore, why not continue on in his name (enthusiastically) burning fear and electrodes into the hearts of the masses, leaving a trail
of broken bodies and cities in my wake, on the road to being the greatest
Mad Scientist in the Galaxy! (end enthusiasm) And the fake mustache is because
mine hasn’t grown in yet.
Keane: Wait, you’re not even old enough to have your own mustache?
Just how old are you?
Von Wicked: 12.
Crisp: 12? That seems a bit young for-
Von Wicked: And a half!
Keane: Uh huh. Molly, remind me never to breed.
Von Wicked: Hey! My Father manufactured his first biochemical plague when
he was seven!
Keane: And if I remember correctly, all his concoctions were confiscated
and he was shipped off to the nut house before he could do anything with him.
Von Wicked: Hey, just because my grandmother happened to call him for dinner
right when he’d perfected the blend, does not negate the fact that I
come from a line of Scientific Geniuses.
Keane: I think the only genius in your line is your grandmother.
Narr: While Keane and Von Wicked were going at it, Molly and Slotter were
doing some feverish plotting of their own, trying to figure out how to take
down the Impenetrable Mauve Cloud.
Molly: I think I know how to do it, but it might cause a complete meltdown
of the entire area! And I’m not sure that it will actually work…I
just wish we knew what was in there!
Slotter: What did you have in mind?
Molly: A plasma cannon.
Slotter: Molly. You know we’re trying to save lives here? Not commit
Molly: That’s why I need to know what’s in there! The only reason
you put up an Impenetrable Cloud is to conspicuously hide something. If what
he’s got can absorb most of the ray, we’ll be fine.
Keane: Oh yeah? Well, YOUR mom-
Molly: Keane! (beat) What are you doing?
Keane: He said my mom was so fat that she has her own zip code!
Slotter: Keane, your mom does have her own zip code.
Narr: Molly gave Keane The Look, and turned to Von Wicked Jr.
Molly: Von Wicked?
Von Wicked: Junior! Von Wicked JUNIOR!
Molly: Shut up!
Von Wicked: Make me!
Narr: Crisp and Keane grabbed Molly’s arms and held her back from rushing
at the Cloud.
Slotter: Von Wicked Jr. What do you have in that cloud, young man?
Von Wicked: What have I got in here? Why, I managed to salvage some of my
father’s old vials of Plague! (laughs) When I set off the rocket they
are fused to, it will blast UP into the air and crash DOWN into the earth,
creating a shockwave that will…SHOCK the earth! And it will carry with
it the particles of BIOCHEMICAL TRAGEDY! (laughs maniacally)
Narr: The Flashpack stared at Von Wicked for a moment, before jumping into
Molly: Plasma Cannon?
Narr: Molly ran to the transport and started rummaging through the compartments.
Molly: Hey Slotter?
Narr: Slotter ran to join her.
Molly: I know you were saving that rubber band for your Giant Rubber Band
Ball O’Doom back at Flashpoint. But, uh….could I have it please?
Slotter: Molly! Do you have to? I don’t have any rubber bands from
Houston yet. It’ll be a great addition, once I reconfigure its atoms
to make it large enough to-
Keane: Slotter! She’ll take you to Office Max and buy you a whole bag
of them! Just give her the rubber band!!
Crisp: I would do as they ask, Slotter. Something tells me that Molly has
some genius plan, and if you don’t give her the rubber band, there might
not be a Flashpoint left to go-
Keane: Shut up, 8215.
Narr: Slotter handed over the rubber band with a hurt look on her face. Molly
rummaged for a few more moments, coming away from the transport with a screw
and the side view mirror.
Molly: Just trust me. Slotter, take this screw. Hold it in the rubber band
like that…yeah, there you go. Keane? Keane! Stop arguing with the twelve
year old and hold the other end of this rubber band. No, just stand there!
Now don’t move!
Narr: Molly broke the mirror into three pieces and positioned them around
the screw in the rubber band, shifting them slightly to catch the sun directly.
While the three of them attended to that, Crisp stood off to the side with
a puzzled look on his face. He made a few hand gestures, like doing math in
midair, then pointed to the right and wandered off. Without Keane’s
insults to keep him occupied, Von Wicked was growing bored.
Von Wicked: Oh Flashpack? Flashpack, don’t tell me you’re actually
trying to stop me?
Narr: Slotter gave the rubber band a final pull, and released. The screw
shot up into the sky. Between the sun, the mirror and the reflective quality
of the screw itself acted as a magnet for the sun’s light. About two
and a quarter miles into the air, the screw melted and began to plummet back
to earth, a giant ball of plasma headed straight at Von Wicked.
Von Wicked: Oh Molly. Do you even know what you’re doing? You’re
sending a plasma ray right at my little Plague Rocket. Apparently you forgot
what happens when you send a plasma shock through an energized rocket. It
doesn’t destroy it, rather, it sets it off, and with a rather nice boost
too. (enthusiastically) Way to go, Flashpack! You’ve just sentenced
the entire planet to the Middle Ages! (laughs)
Molly: Oh God, what have I done? I can't believe I forgot! I’m sorry
guys. I let you down… (cries)
Narr: Molly, Slotter and Keane braced themselves for impact, praying that
such close proximity to the rocket would grant them death when it blasted
off. They waited. And waited. And the plasma ray screamed down into the center
of the Cloud and shook the ground. When the Flashpack looked up the cloud
was gone. And so was the rocket. But not so much in that blasted off way as
that half melted, half exploded hunk of junk sort of way. Von Wicked Jr. was
nowhere to be seen. Unless you counted the blobby goo puddle that sort of
half filled out his smoking tux.
Molly: Huh. How doest that work?
Slotter: And where’s Crisp?
Crisp: I’m here!
Narr: The girls turned and saw Crisp trudging towards them across the desert,
hauling an enormous extension cord behind him.
Keane: Where have you been?
Slotter: Are you ok?
Molly: I still don’t get it…we should all be little blobs of
Keane: And where did you get the wire?
Crisp: This? Oh, I made the power supply unhappy.
Keane: Come again?
Crisp: I unplugged it. You know, you really should check that sort of thing
before you go firing plasma. You could have exploded us! But I remembered
that Molly is always complaining about not having enough power cords on the
station, so I brought it with me.
Slotter: Just, tell us, next time, before you wander off like that, please?
I was worried that you had gotten vaporized too!
Crisp: Oh. I am sorry.
Keane: Yeah…but the part where you just saved our lives was pretty
Crisp: Actually, I burnt my finger.
Narr: Molly unwound the rubber band and chucked it to Slotter. She held it
at arms length, as if the rubber band itself would cause another explosion.
Slotter: And you know what? I don’t think I’m really all that…attached
to this anymore. And Crisp, she doesn’t mean cool as in the temperature
sense. She means you done good.
Crisp: Oh. Ok. Cool.
Narr: Slotter and Crisp finished dragging the extension cord across the desert
and loaded it onto the transport. As the rocket had not been completely melted,
Molly and Keane wandered around it, trying to see if any parts were salvageable,
after which the Flashpack loaded back in and they set off for the launch pad,
and home. (beat) Back at Flashpoint, they all went their separate ways to
freshen up before dinner.
Crisp: Slotter? Can I talk to you for a minute?
Slotter: Sure Crispy! What’s up?
Crisp: Nothing, really. I…it’s just…well…it’s
Slotter: Keane? What about her? Did she do anything to you? (getting slightly
angry) I told her to leave you alone.
Crisp: Well, no…not really. She didn’t say anything. She just…keeps
giving me a "I wonder if this is good to eat" look. It makes me
nervous. I think she thinks I’m still working for Dex.
Slotter: Don’t worry about it Crisp. I’ll talk to Keane again
after dinner. Just play nice with her, and eventually, maybe, if the stars
are lined up right and she doesn’t wake up two minutes before her alarm
is set to go off, you’ll find a friend.
Crisp: I like having you as a friend!
Slotter: Oh Crispy. Come on, let’s go to dinner.
Crisp: All right, just…stop calling me that, would you? And I’ll
be there in a minute. I have to run to the bathroom.
Narr: Meanwhile, Molly had arrived back in her workshop to an unpleasant
Molly: You called in an EXORCIST?
Stellof: Well, yes. Come Ms. Singh, clearly, the reason that your hyper-drive
was not working was because of demonic possession.
Molly: I swear, the universe is just trying to keep me from ever leaving
this room, because when I do CRAZY PEOPLE SHOW UP AND MESS WITH THINGS!
Stellof: Ms. Singh, I-
Narr: Molly, seeing the futility in argument, put her fingers to the bridge
of her nose and walked away. Slotter approached Dr. Stellof while trying to
simultaneously avoid the black robed, two headed priest that was wandering
around the room, sprinkling Holy Water and muttering in some language that
could have been Latin.
Slotter: Doctor? I know you’re, uh, supposed to be the expert here.
But I’m just gonna go ahead and let you know that you should probably
get him out of here. This is Molly and Julie’s baby. And if it starts
quoting psalms…she’s gonna be pissed.
Narr: Twenty minutes later, Slotter had managed to convince Stellof to vacate
the premises, fixed herself a cup of tea, checked into the control room, and
was knocking on the door to Molly’s room.
Slotter: Um, first: simmer. Second: we just got a message from Max.
Slotter: Yes, Max. He’s on screen and wants to talk to you.
Molly: Max is on screen?
Slotter: Yes, Molly. Max is- Am I speaking something not English?
Molly: No. No. You’re good.
Narr: Molly practically ran to the bridge of the station.
Max: All right guys, it’s been great talking to you, but I need to
speak to Molly in private for a minute. I’ll see you all soon!
Narr: The rest of the Flashpack bade good bye to Max and the room emptied.
Max: Hey there, Moll.
Molly: Hi Max. How are things on your end? Are you still off with Puck?
Max: Let’s not talk about that now. I heard you and the gang got into
quite a pickle there.
Narr: Molly blushed a deep shade of crimson.
Molly: It was nothing... We got a meson emitter out of the wreck!
Max: Great! (beat) What’s a meson emitter?
Molly: Do I live with complete dunderheads? It’s the device I’ve
been trying to get my hands on that creates a field of static around the ship.
Kind of like a cloaking device, it will make the ship harder to find.
Max: Then congratulations to you! You gonna have that hyper-drive up and
running by the time I get back?
Molly: I’ll do my best, Max.
Max: Then I’ll see you and your amazing hyper-drive in a couple of
days. Thornfield. Out.
Narr: Will Molly ever get the hyper-drive to work? Will Max make it back
to Flashpoint safely? Is Von Wicked Jr. gone for good? Find out the answers
to these, and more, in next weeks episode: How’s Your Father?